What's eating THAT guy? Oh, his pet lion, Bongo.

Recently, I came face to face with my newest pet peeve: People who wish to purchase or obtain wild or exotic animals for the purpose of having one as a pet. Oh yeah. Now, when my mother was a child, her father had a lot of dogs. Not all at once but over the span of her adolescences. One of their canine friends was, in fact, a wolf. This particular creature wasn't purchased or gained through connections. He actually followed mom home one evening as she rode home on her bike. He was cool enough and they kept him around. Strange but true. Swear. Whatever.
With the exception of Sigfried and Roy or exotic animal trainers, no one, NO average joe could present me with a valid and logical explanation as to why they want or NEED such a bizarre companion. I like to blame, who else, the Disney Empire. Thanks, Balto.
Don't get me wrong. I love animals, except snakes (even though they provide a special niche in the animal kingdom). I adore them. And I find such gorgeous predators as the wolf or cheetah or tiger to be awesome. And who doesn't love monkeys and chimps? Funny as the day is long. But, come on. That's the only reason anyone would really want one; because they're cool. I'm not saying it's not ok for kids to want strange and exotic pets. Imagination is a great thing. It's when these kids grow up and turn into irrational adults that I start to get irritated. Worse off, there are these people who actually go through with their childish desires and GET one. Then they wonder why all their other pets and children (Lord knows they have them) start disappearing. I mean, people around the world try to protect their children and livestock from vicious, WILD predators and some jaggoff in Whatsit, USA wants to open his home to a wolf. "Oh, we'll get a cub. That way, he'll be raised to be tame." BULL. That freaking wolf comes from generations of feral mentalities and urges that no training manual and living room kennel can suppress. Not even deer can be completely tamed, and they're retarded.
And what makes you, Joe Schmoe, so qualified of an individual to have such a pet? HUHMMM??? You work for an American based company doing something that comes nowhere near what could be considered animal training, and you want to bag a cheetah for the family Christmas card. You know what? Go ahead. Get your cheetah or wolf or  chimp or whatever. Be THAT guy. Just be sure to keep it indoor so all the inevitable carnage can be soaked into your carpet and not disturb the neighbors and their measly dog who's presence doesn't pose a constant threat on their lives and communities.
GAH!

Did you see me breathing?

I have a rant, but I'll hold off just long enough to tell you of an interesting story....
After the play tonight we the cast went over to Little Italy, as usual.
We had a marvelous time laughing, eating, and drinking.
After a while, we all went our separate ways.
As we were walking to our separate vehicles, Garison hissed at Lynn, Manny, and I to quickly move to where he was standing, which was behind the van next to Manny's car.
As we did so, he pointed out a young woman several yards ahead of us in the parking lot.
To our shock, this young woman was... urinating in the parking lot up against a truck.
I lie not.
She was in a squatting position, and was quite... bare.....
It was special.
A few minutes later, Danielle calls me to tell me of her fun tale.
As SHE was making her way to her vehicle, an apparently drunken old man presented her with the proposition of sexual intercourse...
Of course, he used much more colorful language and slurred a lot.
I believe his opening statement to her was, "I could just totally F#@% you right now...."
CLASSY.
Groveport's finest certainly does love to flaunt its charms afterhours...

Now for my rant.
*AHEM*
In this production, Danielle and I are dragged out on blankets in the last scene.
And we're "dead."
This is the first time I've ever had to... for lack of better terms "play dead," so I've been kinda playing with it, trying to control my breathing, and, for the most part, I thought I had done a pretty good job.
Then I asked mom last Saturday, after the performance, "Did you see me breathing?"
She said, "I could tell you were trying to control it."
AKA yes, yes I did.
Thanks to this conversation, plus one of my many BFs with Danielle (BF is Bitch fit, for those of you who haven't seen White Girls), I realized something.
We're in a play.
We are actors.
We are pretending to be these people.
I'm not really Regan.
Danielle and Aaron don't really go off stage and do the bad thing.
Doug isn't really going crazy.
Harlow doesn't really gouge out Keith's eyes with his bare hands.
I don't really KILL anyone.
Therefore, I don't really die.
AKA who the heck cares if I'm laying there breathing????
Seriously.
I mean, as long as I'm laying there, not moving, not scratching my nose or laughing at the other actor's lines, or laughing at Danielle, I'm obviously portraying the fact that Regan is dead.
There you go.
That's all that needs to be done.
It's acting.
Ha.
Laurence Olivier once looked at Dustin Hoffman and said, "Dear boy, why don't you try acting? It's so much easier."
Of course, the reason why Sir Laurence said that was because Dustin H. was torturing himself as a.... *SHUDDER* method actor.
Method actors....
UGH.
That's another rant in and of itself.
My point in bringing that up is that it's acting.
IF you are an actor, act.
It's not that hard.

I don't really know how to end this so I'm just going to say good night now.
I am tired and do not wish to type any longer.
Night.

We hang petty thieves and appoint the great ones to public office- Aesop

So, I was driving home tonight and I actually had acouple of rants going through my head.
Politics.
Theatre.
They aren't MAJOR rants, but I believe they are relevant to publicize.
Okay.
Politics.
Now, since I turned 18 in 2005, this will be the first presidential vote where my opinion will matter.Of course, I'm one of those young americans that has always wanted to vote and make my opinion matter.
I know.
Anyways, I personally think this election has been and will be one for the history books.
I mean, no matter the outcome, no matter who is elected, the next presidency will change history.We'll either have an African American President with a regular white guy VP, or a regular white guy President with a female VP.
CRAZY!
Anywhoo...
It's important that whomever we as individuals decide to vote for, we need to make sure we are doing so because it's the right decision.
Don't vote for McCain because you've always voted forthe Republican candidate.Really explore what both candidates have to offer.
Don't vote for McCain because you think Obama is aterrorist.
DON'T vote for McCain because Obama is a black man.
DON'T vote for Obama because Obama is a black man.
Don't vote for Obama because you've always voted forthe Democratic candidate.
Don't vote for Obama because McCain has a female VP.
Now I say all this knowing full well that the majority of Americans WILL vote on at least one or more of these midsets....
Which is sad.
Personally.
I'm voting McCain.
I was going to vote for Obama.
I really was.
I like Obama.
I get a good vibe from him.
I think he is truly concerned for the country.
Unfortunately, the small part of my mind controlled by the "moral Values" voter in me took over withinthe past two months.
SO I'm voting McCain.
Don't hold it against me.
At least I've chosen a standpoint.
Oh, another thing I love about politics is how peoplewill turn on you for your views.Hello.I'm in a play right now with a somewhat diverse cast.
Different strokes, different folks...
And the majority of the cast is for Obama.
However, none of us go at each other's throats when politics come up.
It just shouldn't be that intense.
I don't know.
Maybe I'm just one of those people who can see both sides of the story.
Whatever.
............................................
So that's basically my rant on politics.
A little worn out by that.........................
Give me a minute....................
Okay.
Theatre.
IF you cast someone and you know, casting them, that this person has an illness or has any conditions that may hinder their performance in any way, you should find an understudy.
JUST TO BE SAFE.
HELLO.
IF one of your cast members is injured and, physically, can't or shouldn't do their part, and you have someone else who CAN do it, you should let the second party step in and fulfill the character untilthe original is able to do so.
HELLO.
DO NOT throw people on the stage, ON BOOK, opening night.
DO NOT throw your original actor onstage with crutcheswhen you know you are doing a musical show that requires a bit of movement from that actor.
HELLO.
I've only been doing this theatre stuff for...a little under 10 years, and I get it.
I don't know why people 15, 20 years my senior do notseem to grasp these simple concepts and solutions...
I don't get it.
Common sense I guess.