Merry Christmas Eve Eve!!!

Today is my favorite day of the year.
Christmas Eve Eve!
December 23rd.
Today I get to go around repeatedly saying something semi-eccentric and absurd, but it will no doubt be accepted as it will erupt from my mouth with such joy and merriment that all who hear it will not be able to contain a smile.
HA!
I love the Christmas season!!
Today, I honestly think that the majority of people could be broken down into two groups...
Those that are prepared, raring to go, ready for their Christmas...
And those that are scrambling around like chickens with no heads and slowly losing their sanity.
I am definitely in the former category.
The rest of my household...
Not so much.
I know for a fact that my parents still have yet to finish up their gifts for each other.
My sister's break up has left her with several gifts with which she doesn't know what to do.
Mom had ordered some gifts from a catalog and has yet to receive them, some of which have actually been canceled off her order and left her in a frazzled panic.
Naturally, her panic will no doubt reach my relaxed soul a some point today, causing me to also run around like a headless chicken....

Oh, and let's just stop for a moment and recognize how totally UN-PC I've been this season.
About a week or two ago, I started changing how I said goodbye to people.
I mean strangers.
The cashier at the store.
The couple I just waited on.
My waiter.
EVERYONE has gotten a jolly "Merry Christmas!"
It has been such a delight to watch the faces.
For the most part, it has been me, up at the front of the restaurant, back behind the deli counter wiping something off or cutting lemons, looking up as folks walk out the door, and giving them a "Thanks for coming! Merry Christmas!"
Or I'll drop their change off at the table and say, "Here you go. Merry Christmas!"
And people have responded quite well to it, saying "Thank you" or returning with a "Merry Christmas to you too!"
Last week, this guy was leaving and kept saying "Happy Holidays," so I purposely said "MERRY CHRISTMAS!"
LOL
Yesterday another guy whirled around and gave me a strange look as I gave the salutation.
LOL
I work at a privately owned restaurant.
My managers LOVE that I say Merry Christmas.
In fact, the UN-PC disease has spread to several co-workers and members of the management team.
HA!

Last week, I went shopping with Kim.
We went to the mall, the Mecca for Christmas shopping.
We went into one store in particular and went to purchase some items.
The gal at the counter was very nice, and had helped us with some of our questions and whatnot.
As we left, we both turned and gave a cheerful "MERRY CHRISTMAS."
The girl kinda sputtered with her programmed "Happy Holidays" and a genuine response of "merry christmas."

AH, I love it so.

AGH... CHRISTMAS EVE

As today is the 22nd of December, I feel it is only neccessary to point out that Christmas is 3 days away...
2 if you count Christmas Eve.
Which I do.
See, every Christmas Eve, my dad's side of the family gets together at my grandparent's house.
This means my parents, sister, my grandparents, my uncle Laris and Aunt Linda, my cousin Tiara and her Husband Joe, My cousin Tiffany and her Husband Taren, their kids Kaylin and baby Wyatt, and my cousin Eric, and my great-uncle Bud and his wife Lorraine.
As of the past couple of years, my mother's parents have also joined in with the Christmas Eve Festivities, which is always fabulous.
Another new addition to the Eve fest has been the White Elephant gift game, for which I purchased a strange looking Elf-Fairy dude.
He resembles that of a yard gnome in that he's plump and looks as if he has rosacea, but he has these stubby little wings that made me lose it in the middle of TJ Maxx when I first saw him amongst the random Christmas Decorations.
A while back, we decided to change the regular "get EVERYONE a gift" idea, and do a Secret Santa Gift exchange instead, which has gone fairly well.
We still get the little ones gifts, and Grandma and Grandpa NEVER abide by the rules and always get everyone a gift, but it's still fun.
LOL.
For the past two years, I drew Taren's name from the bowl.
The first year I was totally clueless as to what to get this guy.
Then I remembered the constant back-and-forth ribbing we give each other, and the evil smile crept upon my face.
When he opened his gift that Christmas Eve, the family was in an uproar of laughter as he pulled out a T-shirt with the words "I'M WITH STUPID" sprawled acrossed it chest.
The amusing part was that the words were crowned with an arrow pointing up to the collar of the shirt, calling the wearer stupid, instead of the usual arrow pointing to side, which would put into question the intelligence of one who would stand next to the wearer of the shirt.
LUCKY me, I drew his name again for last Christmas Eve.
OH BOY.
How to top the shirt, was the question.
For now, it was no longer a gift of neccessity or want, but a gift of what could get the biggest laughs.
Christmas Eve had now melded with April Fools Day.
The deliciously Evil idea crept into my mind one day last fall....
One that was to the highest degree of evil that my mother nearly wet herself from laughter at the thought.
LAST CHRISTMAS EVE, I made sure Taren was the last member to open his gift.
I made a big show of it, if you can imagine.
Not that it wasn't a show already.
The box itself was as tall as I am, but only 9 inches wide all around.
Obnoxious enough, I also took the liberty of fashioning a tag out of a scrapbook page.
In big bold letters I put the TO: TAREN, FROM:TAHREA.
As he opened the box of obnoxiousness, there were several chuckles and titters.
He pulled out the packing paper I stuffed into the box.
Then the Tinstle.
More Tinstle....
AND MORE.
Then Tissue Paper.
THEN some more packing paper.
Tinstle.
THEN, a small bag of rocks.
The other bag of rocks.
FINALLY, a small gift bag taped up.
After a few minutes of dealing with the bag, he opened it and pulled out an altoids box.
Opening the box, he pulled out seven different gift cards, and turned to me.
The chuckles and tittering had morphed into uproars...
With my deliciously evil grin, I said, "Taren, you have before you seven gift cards, ranging in denominations of a penny to $20, and it's... your job to figure out which is which!"
More uproars.
This gift really went over a lot better than I had imagined.
After cleaning up the mess, Taren made a show of wanting MY name for this year's Christmas....
lol...
I wonder what deliciously evil gift he has for me...
I've been told he is VERY excited about it....
hmmmmmmmmmmmmm.....

I didn't ask for this punishment... OR Have I mentioned how much I REALLY hate Hannah Montana?

Another christmas present victory!!!

Mom has been in... awe, I guess is the best word, over this *SHUDDER* Hannah Montana guitar thing she found recently in a Target catalog.

NOT for her self, dear God, but for Madison and Grace.

When she asked the two what they wanted for Christmas, mom was greeted with these responses...

Madi: What was your lipgloss we just used?
Mom: It is Dr. Pepper Flavored chapstick.
Madi: I want some of that.
Grace: ME TOO!

Mom: What else do you want for Christmas? Do you want clothes, or games??

Madi: Uhm...

Grace: YEAH!

Mom: Do you want any Hannah Montana stuff?
Madi/Grace:YEAH!!!!

Mom: Okay, what kind of Hannah Montana stuff?

Madi: A Hannah Montana Guitar!

Grace: YEAH! Me too!
Mom: Okay...
And so the adventure began.

The poor woman originally had her eyes on these acoustic guitars for the girls, til she saw they are $80 a pop.

YEAH, that's what we want to buy for them, just so they can turn around and NOT play with it a month later...

HA!

THEN, Lo and behold, Target held the answer...
A Hannah Montana Guitar in which it had three of her songs already programmed.

HA!
For $25!!!
HAHA!!!
But we don't normally make it up to Target.

Argh.

So, shopping in Wal-mart, I attempted to look about the Toy Dept. to find such an item...

to NO avail.

Double Argh.

All seemed lost.
And on top of that, money is kinda tight right now, so it looked grim...
Mom was disappointed that she couldn't get the girls the guitars.

She was sad because she didn't think we'd be able to get them much at all.

THEN, today at work, my dear and wonderful manager Jen and I were discussing her two girls, and what she was getting them.

After I poured out our sob story, she informed me that ODD LOTS had the guitar for which mom was looking.

*GAY GASPS ALL AROUND*

I flipped out.

After work, I scrambled over to the store and rushed to the toy section.
I scoured the aisles looking for the freaking guitars, but couldn't find hide nor hair of 'em.

ARGH!
I went up to the counter and asked a nice older manager about the guitars.

He rounded the counter and led me to a skid which I had sailed by and, LO AND BEHOLD, THERE was a stack of the guitars!!
AIGH!!
I could've kissed the man!

AND they were only $20!
HAH!

I scooped up two and quickly made my way up to the register and out the door.

When mom woke up and saw what awaited her on the kitchen table, she was quite joyous.

I made her the happiest woman in the world.

NOW, the two large toys are sweetly nestled in their wrapping paper.
Several other small Hannah Montana gifts are also individually wrapped on top of the guitars as well....

All now await Christmas day....

Which is only seven freaking days away.

Good God...

Now we just have to get some stuff for the baby and we are set.....

ugh.

Christmas is a week away. Just thought I'd share that...

Guess who got her Christmas shopping done!!!
WOOT!
Well, I have a couple of minor things still to get, BUT, for the most part, I'm done!!!!
AUGH!
Thank God!
Okay, overload of exclamation marks.
I'm so glad I got my gifts...
This year, I just got stuff for mom, dad, Junia, Madison, Grace, Nevaeh, and my cousin Tiara, since I drew her name in the family secret santa thing this year.
Kim and I went to Easton today.
That was fun.
We ate at Brio and Starbucks, and walked around, looking at the lights.
And I got the second part of my gift for Tiara and mom's gifts.
AH....
Success.
Then, I came home and did one of my favorite things...
I WRAPPED them.
I LOVE wrapping gifts.
Now I have to get a gift for our family's White Elephant gift game and some stuff for the girls, and I am set, and with 8 days to spare.
Well, 7 since I'll be giving Tiara's gift to her on Christmas Eve.
In any case, I'll be getting the final gifts on Saturday, since that's my next free day.
Technically, I won't be FREE since I'll be babysitting Nevaeh....
BUT, I'll take her shopping with me....
Not like she has a choice, being a baby and all...

I can't believe Christmas is a week away.
Seriously.
a WEEK away.
That's 7 days!
AGH.
Crazy.
I'm off Christmas Eve and Day, which means I'll be baking and cooking my pattootie off with mommy dearest while simultaneously keeping her from taking that final step over the brink of insanity.
AGAIN.
At least she doesn't drink.
YET.

Yes, Virginia, it is the holiday season. Now leave me alone...

Reading Danielle's last blog, I realized Thanksgiving is six days away.
UGH.
Now, to be fair, I do enjoy this time of the year for what it is.
I love cooking and baking and eating.
I love singing and dancing to Christmas carols.
I LOOOOOOOOOOOOVE decorating the trees.
Every year, I put a theme to the living room tree.
Usually it's a color scheme.
Last year it was Santas and Nutcrackers.
THIS year it is going to be birds.
I've purchased a ton of bird ornaments for it.
AGH!
It's my favorite.
I host a christmas party for my friends every year and that has me stoked as well.
I really used to hate this time of year.
Why?
Well, to help me sum it all up is this poem I wrote years ago that really embodies how I felt back then.....

Candy canes, Mistletoe.
White, soft, gentle snow.
Carols, A Christmas tree.
A red and green stocking for me.
All these and more are what people will say
when asked what reminds them of Christmas Day.
Not me though.
Oh, nonononononono....
Not stockings or mistletoe.
All these things may be great
But they aren't what reminds me of Christmas Day.
I envision spoiled children
and their poor tired parents,
The bitter cold
and the constant straining errands.
Loved ones trying to top last year's gift..
these things and more really get me miffed.
Give me the presents
but keep family away!
Or up in my bedroom is where I'll stay.
I can't stand the rush
of the idiot shoppers
who always make such a scene,
it's a really show stopper.
Or the department store santas
with their fake white beards.
Instead of looking Jolly,
they look really weird.
That's my version of Christmas...
It's sad, but it's true.
And with that
MERRY CHRISTMAS
and Happy New Year too.

Santa Baby, give everyone else a calendar, please...

SO.
The holidays are only weeks away.
Yeah.
2008 apparently had no desire to stick around, because this year just flew by.
So, unfortunately, Christmas will come bounding upon ere long...
Bleh.
I noticed something last night that caught my eye and struck me as absurd.
People have actually just taken down halloween decorations and immediately replaced them with Christmas decorations.
Why?
And they aren't simple christmas lights and maybe a reindeer or two.
NO.
These are the people who buy every inflatable santa claus-in-a-snoglobe-that-is-bigger-than-the-house (or trailer), and frosty the snowman-that-looks-like-he-might-be-mentally-challenged-and-might-eat-your-children-because-he-can....
Subtle is not in the vocabulary.
I had the pleasure of taking my 5-year-old cousin Madison to see.... *SHUDDER*... "High School Musical 3" yesterday.
Yeas, my soul died a little...
As we were driving home, we happened upon a couple of different houses with this situation.
Being the ever bright and wonderful creature she is, Madison looked out the window as I pointed these houses out, and yelled, "WHAT?! It's not even Christmas time yet, PEOPLE!"
AH, the wisdom of a child.