Wednesday, March 31, 2010

Georgia, Part Two

As the plane rose from Port Columbus, each light was a twinkling jewel in the landscape. They gave a comforting glow to the picture the small window created for me. The funny thing is as we descended into Atlantan it was lighter as the sun was rising and the lights of the city were bright and harsh. They almost intimidated me, as did the INSANE size of the Atlanta Airport. RIDICULOUS. I completely despise airports. Completely. Period. However, they got me here, and for that I am thankful. After getting the halfing plane with Carol, Ray picked us up and took us back to grandpa's house to drop off our luggage and see Ethel, grandpa's wife.
At the hospital I finally got to see my grandfather. I also got meet his brother David, and Whitney and Scott, David's kids. They were such wonderful people, full of the sense of humor that must be a prominant trait of the Tallent family. Although grandpa's health is diminishing, he was somewhat responsive and was joking with everyone else. I am so glad I'm here finally, but so sad that it took so long.
Tomorrow I shall return to the hospital with Ray and Carol. I hope tomorrow is a smooth day and neither Grandpa or Ethel suffer.
Please God.

Georgia, Part One

After a wonderful birthday, I have quite a week ahead of me. My biological father, Ray, called me yesterday, as he has for the past few weeks, to inform me of the status of his father's health. Little to my surprise, grandpa's health has deteriorated greatly and he has taken a turn for the worse. Ray then surprised me by asking me to come down to say goodbye. Come down... to Georgia. Macon, Georgia, to be specific. Since I was a child, traveling to see my grandfather has been one of my greatest wishes. Of course, my decision was simple. Only it wasn't. Going to Georgia meant I had to cancel my classes for this week, cancel rehearsal plans for the Easter program, actually missing the Easter program, and Rhonda's birthday celebration. After weighing my options, making phone calls, apologizing, and completely freaking out, my decision was made up. So now I sit in Port Columbus, Gate C56, waiting to board my flight. I had to wake up from an hour's worth of sleep around 2:45 am and get here about 4. My shaking due to nerves, stomach gurgling,  and lack of sleep have subsided slightly, though I'm not looking forward to the Atlanta airport as I have been told several times that it is enormous. My one relief is that Carol, Ray's darling wife, will be arriving a few minutes  before I will on her flight from Florida. Then, we shall wait for our 10:20 am flight to Macon where we will meet up with Ray.
Then, we venture into unknown circumstances. I don't know what this next week will hold for me, whether I shall be attending a funeral or not. My flight coming home has not yet been planned as our plans are unknown. I just pray the flights are smooth and I don't completely lose my mind in an airport.

Please God. Let this be a wonderful experience. Keep me safe.

Thursday, March 18, 2010

Day five: I'm broken

I could not take it anymore! I had to go outside! I have been in this house for FIVE days! ME, who spends most of her life at work, theatre, classes, church, ELSEWHERE. ME, who uses home as a base to sleep, charge my phone, my laptop, and sometimes eat. ME, who uses this house as a place where I occasionally see those people I refer to as my family. And here I am, sitting on this couch or in bed, miserable, for FIVE DAYS! AUGH! I couldn't take it anymore. Ami kept walking from the back door to me. Then he climbed into the armchair and started gazing out, almost longingly. Then he came back to me. Then back to the door. Then back to me. THEN, we hear something outside. Dad, roughhousing with Aidenn. Well, that got Ami going. "SOMEONE is OUTSIDE and they are having a GOOD TIME and it's NOT ME!" Well, that's what I imagine he was saying.Meanwhile, I'm slowly going stir-crazy sitting here. So I turn MAGIC: The Magician's Secrets REVEALED 2, and get properly dressed. I put in my contacts for the first time in FIVE DAYS, which was an interesting struggle as the right one had sat in the container with no solution for FIVE DAYS. So I was greeted to a shriveled piece of plastic. Mmmmmmm... After finding my replacement lenses and getting dressed, I got the leash and we were ready to go.
Teddy decided he would join us after some persuasion. He's a grumpy old man of 10, after all. And soon He was leading the way down the path.

Everything is still very much... brown from the winter. But the sun and breeze are great indications that spring is very close, thank goodness...
I feel very fortunate to have such a great piece of the wildlife in my backyard. While we were trekking over the hill, I saw two deer sailing over the brush and into the woods, their white tails flicking with each leap.
















A certain Amadeus would've dragged me like a ragdoll to catch up with them had he also spied them.




















We did, however, find hoof prints in the soft earth, indicating recent activity.








And Aidenn found himself on the trail of an unfortunate rabbit, who darted pasted us only seconds before I caught this moment.












Thank goodness Teddy chose to lazily sniff through leaves and not give chase. 
After several minutes of walking around and listening to the distant yelps of Aidenn running amok after that poor rabbit, we decided to head back to the house. Once again, Teddy took it upon himself to lead the way. :o)



Wednesday, March 17, 2010

Day four of my imprisonment

I have reached the brink of insanity. I have sat in this house for four days now. I no longer find solace in my bedroom. Nay, it is but a tomb of disease, a sepulcher of sickness, enshrouded by used tissues and a snuggie. Slowly, the bed and walls have begun to mock me. Their entrapment reminding me of the health and freedom that exists outside their walls. They torment me so. When I shiver I reach for a blanket. But soon I am covered in beads of sweat. It is agony! My nose is no longer a nose but a red beacon of pain and trumpeting alarums. Even my own voice betrays me. I no longer carry the light effeminate notes of a 22 year woman, but those of a 45 year old man with a heavy cigarette addiction. My only companion, my laptop, has become my enemy. I loath its screen, I loath the places it takes me, yet I cannot stay away. I want to leave this ungodly house of madness but cannot step outside for fear of chill and more sickness. I must sit, stewing, simmering, festering in my aggravation. I long for sleep to bring the next day, praying it will bring health and an end to this horror.
Lord help my poor soul.

Tuesday, March 16, 2010

An Ode to the sick and ill at heart

A cough,
a sniffle,
a fear,
a pill,
a pillow,
 sleep.
A temperature,
 a sneeze,
a tissue,
a tissue,
a cough,
a glare,
a tissue,
a pill,
 a pillow,
sleep.
A temperature,
a cough,
a cough,
a coughing fit,
a sneeze,
 a sniffle,
a red nose,
a growl of frustration,
a cough,
a sneeze,
a tissue,
a tissue,
a pathetic moan,
two pills,
a pillow.
A cough,
an string of incoherent growls and moans,
a sneeze,
two tissues,
a pill,
a sneeze,
a tissue,
a coughing fit,
an sneeze,
a pill,
two pillows.

Monday, March 15, 2010

Such is the life of an actress.

For the past year, I had been so focused on Kidsummer that I gave little thought as to what was ahead in my theatrical quest once the musical was over. Now that I've closed the theatre doors on my production and everyone has moved on, I have realized that I have been forcibly placed into the lifestyle of the everyday American: Wake up, work, go home, menial household duties, bed. Lather, rinse, repeat. Luckily, Theatre Vault has kept me in the loop, allowing me to attend productions and revel in the company of other theatre folk. But that can only satisfy the soul for so long before that familiar pang starts back up, that overwhelming need to act, to perform. Fellow thespians know this feeling quite well, suffering through a sabbatical only to long for the stage and lights. In short, I NEED TO ACT! Aforementioned fellows also know that there is pride in directing but it is so much different than acting. It takes on a different meaning, a different affect on the individual. I love directing, and I hope to do it for years to come. Especially with all of the wonderful youngsters that I've been blessed with. I just can't wait to get another part. For anyone who has met me in real life, you know that I am a bit... dramatic at times. That drive has to be exercised through some outlet every once in a while or I go crazy. Thank God acting was invented.
 So now, the question remains: What do I do now??? Well, I have a few options, thankfully. I won't name names until I am 100% certain, there is one role that I'm excited about, and I think I may get. Hopefully. If that doesn't work out, I'll probably cry, but audition for another show and life will go on. Such is the life of an actress.  

Saturday, March 13, 2010

A poem...

I saw your face again today
I had to look away
When I came back to see
you were no longer looking to me
I know you're elsewhere calling their name
I know I've lost all I could have gained
And there is no tomorrow
There is only sunset on what could have been
No more time, no chance to win
I wish I would have known when I broke your heart 
that you would one day break mine
I wish I could have told myself before it was too late
but then I just ran out of time
And there is no tomorrow
There is only sunset on what could have been
No more time, no chance to win
I must bow down graciously to whoever it may be
who's taken your love from me
I must smile and break away 
realizing you did not wait
And there is no tomorrow
There is only sunset on what could have been
No more time, no chance to win

Tuesday, March 2, 2010

Exhausted, but still looking for stuff to do....

I am so exhausted. I haven't had time to sit and breathe. I know part of me doesn't really want to, though my body has this thing where, after a while, it wants to sleep and it fights my will. To punish me, it decides to grab the next bout of sickness or lethargy and hold on for dear life, forcing me to stop. As mom has been sick since the day of grandpa's funeral, I know that may very well happen if I'm not careful. Ugh.
After the show, several if not all of my actors and parents asked me if I would be doing a summer show. Since there is such a demand for it, I announced to the board that I, indeed, would like very much to do a summer show. I am a glutton for punishment, I know. However, it is a wonderful experience to get to know all of the kids and to allow them to embrace and explore their talents. Plus, I gain experience as a director each time I am involved with a show. I love it and I love the children. Actually, I just fall in love with the families that come and are involved with each of my shows. They are all awesome and helpful people. 
So, after Kidsummer, I find myself with a dilemma... How am I going to top THAT? I have been presented with a few ideas. I would like to stay with the same theme of adaptations of Shakespeare, and have found a few different ones. Since they're 50 minutes, I think I'll do one of those for the summer show.
For next season's show, I think I might attempt another musical. Jane keeps bringing up Roar of the Greasepaint-Smell of the Crowd... It seems like a cool show, and I'm going to looking into it.

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